How Beauty Invites us to Tend our Hearts

Aug 19 / Amy Brady
When I walked into her office that day, I lugged behind me seven years of secondary trauma and a weariness that had made its way into my very bones.

After welcoming our daughter home, we had unknowingly stepped into the world of undiagnosed autism. Having been institutionalized for the first two years of her life, no one saw she may be on the spectrum.

Catastrophic meltdowns, intense sensory struggles, and parenting a toddler who lacked language skills all led to a break in my soul and my body. Engrossed in her care and that of my other children, I forgot to attend to my own healthcare. Years of missed checkups vanished into the bottomless pit of needs. When my doctor suggested I was in depression and asked why I hadn't sought help, all I could say was I was busy caring for others. 

She very blatantly declared, "If you're dead, you can't help them. And if you don't care for yourself, you won't be able to help them at some point." Ouch.

This abrasive truth spoken to me at one of the lowest seasons of my life was what I needed to find myself again. I began to see that caring for myself with equal attentiveness and availability as I gave to others, was not self-indulgent. Unraveling the stories and ideas that caused me to feel this way also became part of the healing journey. 

Even airlines realize the importance of the caregiver. Before the wheels leave the ground, there is a reminder of the protocol regarding what to do if the cabin loses pressure. If we are traveling with someone in our care, should an oxygen mask drop, we are to place the mask on ourselves first. 

As one who accompanies another closely, nothing feels quite unorthodox as caring for our needs first. The oxygen mask analogy invites us to remember that, just like those we accompany, we have limitations and boundaries. Ignoring our personal needs is unsustainable. We are also created to live in deep dependence on God. 

Without His breath animating our being, we can't survive. Attending to our needs is a vital spiritual practice if we are to companion others in their weary and heavy places. 

 If I seek God's help to care for myself, which enables me to better care for His children, then self-care becomes not only soul work but sacred work. As we pursue this work, we permit those we companion to do the same.

In the last several years, I've discovered the practices that feed my whole self. I'm often surprised it doesn't take as much time as I imagine to be refreshed and connected to my Source. As an introvert (with an extroverted life), I refuel by being alone. Silence and solitude, walks in beautiful gardens, quiet reading at a coffee shop, strolling a favorite store, yoga classes, personal spiritual direction, and seeing the sunrise are all soul care. 

For an extrovert, being with others or doing activities that are nourishing to you with a friend may help guide you in ways to recharge.

Participating playfully in beauty is a portal to healing. It is absolutely essential to the care of our souls. God calls to us from within beauty, where we are invited into His joy and can find the strength we need for life's struggles, pain, and weariness.

Most of us struggle to engage in the current moment. The past and the future are often weary and worn playgrounds where our minds run unhinged. Beauty invites us in and helps us stay connected to the present.

Staying in the moment, wonder and delight take over. Opportunities to encounter beauty abound–prayer forms, art, food, music, creation, meaningful conversations, liturgy, good books, museums, even karaoke! While we are preoccupied with beauty's excitement, worry, and weariness, take a seat, and we discover an unexpected form of rest. 

Daring to pause so we can step into beauty and allow our souls to rest primes our hearts and helps us listen and encounter the truth God has for us in that moment. The more often we allow beauty to beckon, the more sacred these spaces become, and the heart begins to yearn for them.

Rest, however, is more than beauty alone. Sometimes it's more practical. 

Rest is listening to your body, resisting overscheduling, and rejecting the hustling mindset so you do not push past your limits. Rest can be time to be alone with yourself and God or fun moments with family and friends.

Rest can mean not pressuring yourself to figure things out quickly, embracing the limitations God has allowed on your life, and softly relaxing into that place, knowing He is with you. It can also mean the Ignatian practice of indifference, allowing oneself to receive what God has given rather than holding a distinct preference for a particular outcome. After all, our limitations are His graces in disguise. 

Above all, rest is letting go—a choice to release things that do not add but rather subtract from life. Prayerfully discerning what I can change and what I cannot, asking for His wisdom to know the difference. 

When self-care is elevated, it becomes soul-care, which in turn becomes a sacred co-laboration with God to live free of attachments and lean into the rest He has for us. Immersing ourselves in beauty calms our nervous system, slows our breath, and rests our mind. Finding it more accessible to stay in the present, we are now available to hear God's truth. His greatest Truth, and the one we need to listen to the most about, is that He tenderly loves us exactly where we are in this and every moment. 


Amy Brady
Amy is the founder of Evergreen Soul Wellness, a spiritual wellness LLC, that combines her passions and experience of two decades of ministry into one place. Early in ministry she was a professional women’s speaker, author of eight Bible studies, and an Advent devotional.

Today she is a Spiritual Director, a Guide for The Spiritual Exercises, and a content contributor with The Yoga Abbey, where she combines her passions of spiritual direction, contemplative practice, and writing about the practice of embodied faith.

Amy is a wife of over thirty years, Mom to five hilarious humans ranging in ages from 29 to 12. 

Her new favorite role is Mimi to her grand joys.

In reality she resides in Orlando, but in her head she lives in London, sipping on tea and planning her next travel adventure.

https://linktr.ee/EvergreenSoulWellness