It's Okay to Not Be Okay, but Where is God?
Mar 9
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Tracy Busse
When the world is on fire, it's okay not to be okay. As a soul care provider, I have found this season of people helping heavier than most. I saw a meme on social media of a therapist responding to a friend’s question, “How are the therapists doing?” She interrupts, “WE’RE NOT OK, WE’RE NOT OK!” I chuckled because I relate. Regardless of your political stance, the world is scary and overwhelming right now.
When social media and news outlets show videos of people being killed and nations being bombed, we are not immune to the images we see. What we are experiencing right now is communal trauma, which occurs when communities are impacted by the same traumatic events. The Epstein files hold details that have the ability to create trauma in its readers where trauma was not previously present. Exposure to traumatic stories has the ability to create a traumatic response in our bodies, even though we did not personally go through it. This is called vicarious or secondary trauma. As a trauma therapist, I am quite familiar with the phenomenon.
In this season, I find that traumatic processing is as prevalent in spiritual direction sessions as it is in therapy. I am aware that the ministry of walking with others, in any capacity, takes more energy in this season of our world than at other times. The main reason is that when your community is being traumatized, the people helpers are not immune to its impact. We are all in this together. So where is God?
The other day, I met a four-year-old girl playing on her bike near her parents. She wanted to meet my puppy, so I took a moment to meet her. I expressed admiration for her Minnie Mouse helmet and her pink bike with streamers. With the most serious expression on her face, she said, “Wait there!” She ran toward her bike, glanced back, and said, “please don’t leave.” I smiled and assured her I was not going anywhere. While I chatted with her dad, she returned holding two sparkly strands from her bike’s streamers. I knelt down and expressed wonder at what felt like a magical gift. She solemnly nodded her head and ran off to play.
When I spent time reflecting on my day with God, I saw how the Holy Spirit met me as a little girl. She was feisty, bold, and full of generosity and wonder. What might seem like a small gift was the most precious thing I received that day. God permeates thousands of moments each day. I find Divine love in the people I encounter, animals, and nature. When the wind gently caresses my cheek, I imagine Jesus saying I love you. Sometimes the wind roars around me, and I am reminded of God’s power and presence in this world. When God meets me as a little girl, I encounter God’s vulnerability and purity. There are millions of ways in which God reveals God’s self to us each day.
While parts of the world are literally on fire, while innocents are being killed and abused, God endures with us. How God is present, or why God allows evil, is a question I often encounter in spiritual direction and therapy. Despite my theological training, there is not a “right” answer to this question. It is something we wrestle with multiple times throughout our faith journey. Spiritual directors, therapists, and other soul care providers learn how to hold safe spaces for those wrestling with God. In turn, we need to find support as well. We are all human.
In addition to personal therapy, spiritual direction, and supervision, I find help for my soul in the practice of wonder and presence. Staying present to the current moment tunes my body to the song of the holy around me. There are times the present moment leads me to weep or to feel anger toward what is happening in our world, but that is not the only invitation I am offered.
The other night, I walked my pup under the gaze of a full moon. Suddenly, the world went dark. I looked up to see black clouds edged with an ethereal light. Wind cooled my face as the dog, and I looked up, waiting to see if the light would return. When the moon re-emerged, we returned to our evening rituals, and I was reminded that even when darkness comes, light has a way of inviting us to pause. When we slow down, we find that God is also present in the darkness. In his book God Has a Dream, Desmond Tutu reflected that during Apartheid, “There were times when you had to whistle in the dark to keep your morale up, and you wanted to whisper in God’s ear, “God, we know you are in charge, but couldn’t you make it a little more obvious?”
Yesterday, as I worried about our country at war, I reached into my pocket and pulled out a sparkly strand of God’s love. A smile crossed my face as I remembered the little girl who was determined to give me a gift. I wonder what gifts God seeks to offer you today? How might a song in the darkness give solace in uncertainty? Where can we find wonder in the simple moments of each day? Are we being called to share our gifts with others in distress? Whether you are someone who accompanies others through the darkness or you are a pilgrim walking on the way, I pray that love will find you in the simple but wondrous moments of each day.
Starting March 12, 2026
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Starting April 29, 2026
Tracy Busse
Tracy Busse’s life and work have fueled an ongoing desire to move in harmony with the Trinity and to create spaces where all can encounter intimacy with God.
Tracy is a writer, teacher, counselor, and spiritual director. For over eighteen years, she has provided therapy to children and adult survivors of trauma and human trafficking. She also provides consultation and training to a variety of organizations who serve leaders and marginalized populations. Continued growth in Kingdom life and integrating God’s love and presence into her work are the heart of her practice.
In addition, Tracy is completed a doctorate in Spiritual Direction at Fuller Theological Seminary, which offered the opportunity to enjoy a 30-day Ignatian Retreat. The fruit of this experience continues to grow and reveal greater depths of God’s love and abundant grace. With the belief that God is in all things, Tracy finds delight on her paddleboard, hiking, playing the guitar, painting, traveling, and resting in the company of fellow image bearers.
Tracy Busse’s life and work have fueled an ongoing desire to move in harmony with the Trinity and to create spaces where all can encounter intimacy with God.
Tracy is a writer, teacher, counselor, and spiritual director. For over eighteen years, she has provided therapy to children and adult survivors of trauma and human trafficking. She also provides consultation and training to a variety of organizations who serve leaders and marginalized populations. Continued growth in Kingdom life and integrating God’s love and presence into her work are the heart of her practice.
In addition, Tracy is completed a doctorate in Spiritual Direction at Fuller Theological Seminary, which offered the opportunity to enjoy a 30-day Ignatian Retreat. The fruit of this experience continues to grow and reveal greater depths of God’s love and abundant grace. With the belief that God is in all things, Tracy finds delight on her paddleboard, hiking, playing the guitar, painting, traveling, and resting in the company of fellow image bearers.
