Meaning Making Friends

 A 2023 Harvard Graduate School of Education report found that almost 60% of
people ages 18-25 feel their lives lack meaning. ¹ That is an enormous problem.
How does someone bring value to the world if they cannot find it within themselves?
How can people discover what they love when nothing matters beyond making rent?
How would a person evaluate the highest good in the decisions set before them if
meaning is absent from the process?

 Most people today go through these periods where meaning feels scarce. Confusion,
frustration, and fear follow, diminishing our sense of call to this life. What if we can turn these moments to our advantage? What if these moments are dangerously good friends rather than enemies to fight off or hide from? How would we even begin to treat them as such?

 My name is Ben Shoup, and as a spiritual director, I get to foster conversations with
people seeking the Divine presence in their daily lives. These encounters often reveal a newfound depth of meaning, uncovering previously unnoticed insights.

 It happened when Margo told me about the sleepless night she had the night before.
"I get sensory issues sometimes," she explained. "I would lay there until the weight of
my comforter started to feel too heavy, and then I would kick it up so it wasn't laying on me so tightly. Then, just as I would get close to sleep, it would settle back down, and I'd have to kick again." She scowled for a moment. "Now that I've told you about it, my clothes feel the same way."

 I nodded and thought, "Well, this is either going to work, or Margo will think I am
crazy." I took a breath, chose my words, and said, "Margo, if you go to your inner world
and tell the weight of your clothing that you welcome it, how does it respond to you?"

 Margo laughed. "Okay, that's weird... but I'll try it." The silence lasted a long time, but
I could see on her face that it was the moment our whole session had been for. She
sighed with relief when she returned and said, "I don't fully know how to explain what I just experienced, but I know I don't need to be overwhelmed by my outer layer
anymore."

I nodded. "So, how do you sense the Divine's invitation from our conversation today?"

 Margo took a deep breath and almost whispered, "I just need to sit with God's
freedom for a while." We gave the remainder of our time to silence.

 I could tell many stories like this, making meaning in strange encounters with the
Divine. As you can see, I did very little. The journey was between Margo and the Divine. What little I did do, though, can help you foster more meaning personally and with the people you love as you seek the Divine daily.

 Experience has shown me that people often do not hear the energy in their sensations or feelings when they first share with me. The Divine presence is asking to be felt in those moments. To do that, I like to personify the sensation or feeling, as I did with Margo. The process is simple.

 First, identify a significant sensation or feeling. Then, look at it as its own person,
with will and agency. Finally, converse with it about what it wants and what message it is bringing forward. You've found the encounter with the Divine when it points you
toward greater gratitude for life or a growing edge toward wholeness. As you approach your daily experiences this way, life begins to teem with Divine meaning.

 Most people go through at least short periods of feeling their lives are meaningless.
No one has to stay there. As you listen to yourself and your loved ones, catch those
sensations, those feelings, those dangerously good friends. Personify them and
discover how they open you to a world overflowing with Divine meaning.

1 Richard Weissbourd et al., “On Edge: Understanding and Preventing Young Adults’ Mental Health Challenges,” Making Caring Common Project (Cambridge, MA: Harvard Graduate School of Education, October 2023), mcc.gse.harvard.edu/reports/on-edge.